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*<nowiki/>#49: '''Always have backup'''
 
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[[Category:Zombies|Homers : they are the dumb ones. Hawkings : they are smarter than there friends the homers Ninjas: the ninja before you hear them you hear your own screams T 8100s : they are stronger, deadlier, and harder to kill]]

Revision as of 13:59, May 14, 2020

Double Tap

Columbus' rules to surviving the zombie apocalypse. The rules repeatedly appear throughout the first movie, often in comedic placements and interacting with the environment, such as when a zombie knocked off "o" in "cardio" in the gas station chase.

The rules

  • #1: Cardio - When the virus stuck, for obvious reasons, the first ones to go were the fatties.
  • #2: Double Tap - In those moments when you're not sure the undead are really dead dead, don't get all stingy with your bullets.
  • #3: Beware of Bathrooms - Don't let them catch you with your pants down.
  • #4: Seatbelts - Fasten your seat belts. It's gonna be a bumpy ride.
  • #7: Travel light - And I don't mean just luggage.
  • #17: Don't be a Hero - Why don't you take this one?
    • #17: Be a Hero - Some rules are made to be broken. (Rule updated)
  • #18: Limber up - Going down that hill, it is very important.
  • #22: When in Doubt, Know Your Way Out
  • #23: Ziploc™ Bags - You got enough problems, moisture shouldn't be one of them.
  • #31: Check the Back Seat - No one back there but my duffel bag.
  • #32: Enjoy the little things - I hate to give credit to anyone who looks like Yosemite Sam, but I'm writing it down.
  • #36: Sunscreen -
  • #42: Keep your hands to yourself - It's just polite.
  • #52: Don't be afraid to ask for help - Yeah and they ignored rule 52: don't be afraid to ask for help.
  • #53: Wet naps -

Reasonings behind the rules

Columbus' rules were design for survivability foremost, each rule an attempt mitigate the dangers of Zombieland or to make daily life in it more bearable.

  • #1: Cardio - Zombies aren't fast. To escape, it's more important to be able to run longer than faster.
  • #2: Double Tap - One clean shot to the head can protect against zombies playing possum.
  • #3: Beware of Bathrooms - Zombies know to hang around them, caution can help avoid an ambush.
  • #4: Seatbelts - Wear one, zombies rarely do. Breaking can send them flying away.
  • #7: Travel light - Traveling light means traveling fast. Only pack essentials.
  • #17: Don't be a Hero - Unnecessary risks are risks that shouldn't be taken.
    • #17: Be a Hero - But for loved ones, some risks are worth taking.
  • #18: Limber up - A muscle cramp during a zombie chase is a death sentence.
  • #22: When in Doubt, Know Your Way Out - Knowing where to flee can aid an escape.
  • #23: Ziploc™ Bags -
  • #31: Check the Back Seat - Zombies or little girls with guns may hide there, don't be caught off guard.
  • #32: Enjoy the little things - Zombieland is harsh, enjoy happiness where it can be found to stay sane.
  • #36: Sunscreen -
  • #42: Keep your hands to yourself - It ostensibly leads to better group cohesion and facilitation of rule #52.
  • #52: Don't be afraid to ask for help - Groups have a greater chance of survival.
  • #53: Wet naps -

Commandments

Flagstaff had a variant list of rules he referred to as Commandments. They include but are not limited to:

  • Commandment #1: Teamwork.
  • Commandment #5: Confirm your kills.
  • Commandment #12: The world is your bathroom.
  • Commandment #13: Avoid perishables.
  • Commandment #16: Expect the unexpected.
  • Commandment #20: Warm up.
  • Commandment #28: Shade.
  • Commandment #29: Cardiovascular fitness.
  • Commandment #45: Mind your manners.

Deleted Rules

Promotional videos starring Woody Harrelson and Jesse Eisenberg expanded on the list presented in the film:

  • #6: Cast iron skillet
  • #8: Get a kickass partner
  • #12: Bounty paper towels
  • #15: Bowling Ball
  • #21: Avoid strip clubs
  • #29: The buddy system
  • #33: Swiss army knife
  • #34: Clean socks
  • #48: Hygiene
  • #49: Always have backup
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